As per physics colour is that band of light spectrum(the range of wavelengths) which the human eye can detect.

This band of spectrum is passed to the human brain which in turn ,        helps us to perceive color.

The human eye has three types of cones or colour receptors – Red, Green and Blue(Red , Blue and green are the three primary colours for us). These three types of cones can absorb wavelengths from 420 – 700 nanometres and help us detect about 100 different gradations of colours. The human brain combines these 100 gradations to enable the average human to distinguish about 1 million different colors

But what if our eye can be engineered to detect a wider range of spectrum? Imagine if our eye can have another type of cone to detect more primary colors? This special quality already exists in many animals and some humans, Read – Tetrachromat

Imagine how our new world would be like if we became a tetrachormat or pentachormat or something even beyond?

The rainbow would no longer be of seven colours. The world would be full of new colors and shades. How and with what words would you describe such a world? How would you describe and explain a colour you never saw before. Everything – living or object would look and feel different.

Imagine the impact on culture, art and literature. They would be redefined. All the famous painting of the world would now be fresh. Literature would be at a loss of words. The poetic expressions   – purple rain, green mile; red rose might turn out to be incorrect. The crow might no longer be black.  The grass might not be green now on any of the sides. Pink might no longer be the favourite colour of all the girls.

Imagine the impact technology and fashion. The best resolution monitors would suddenly feel pale. There would now be more shades to permute on the dresses – these new colors would rule the ramp and our minds.

Imagine the impact on our physic. We might initially find it difficult to even identify old and familiar things. We may develop new feelings. We would literally see our old world falling down in front of our eyes and new world takings its place. It would force us to revise the fundamental concept set in our brain. It will make us realize that our perception of things is just a model. There is no absolute truth –

“The sky is no longer blue; it just used to be;
The sky was never blue, we just used to see.”

Perhaps we need such a magical experience to crumble down the rigid walls which have trapped our free will. Perhaps we need such an experience to revitalize, the once considered most important trait of humans – ‘To question something and not believe in it blindly’.
Perhaps we need the eighth colour of the rainbow to appreciate the existing seven.

· Oracle, Bangalore: From an employee who was performing the “mundan” ceremony of his 10 year old son:
“as I want to shave my son’s head, please leave me for two days..”
________________________________

· Another gem from CDAC. Leave letter from an employee who was performing his daughter’s wedding:
“as I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week’s leave..”
________________________________

· From H.A.L, Administration Dept:
“As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave.”
________________________________

· Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:
“Since I’ve to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return, please grant me half day casual leave”
________________________________

· An incident of a illness:
“I am suffering from fever, please declare one-day holiday.”
________________________________

· A leave letter to the headmaster:
“As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today”
________________________________

· Another leave letter written to the headmaster:
“As my headache is paining, please grant me leave for the day.”
________________________________

· A covering note:
“I am enclosed herewith…”
________________________________

· Another one:
“Dear Sir: with reference to the above, please refer to my below…”
________________________________

· Another actual letter written for application of leave:
“My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave”.
________________________________

· Sample of letter writing:-
“I am well here and hope you are also in the same well.”

________________________________

· A candidate’s job application:
“This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ‘ Typist and an Accountant – Male or Female’…. As I am both(!! )for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience, I am applying for the post………..

email forward from Aakriti

This is another movie with a interesting story line. Shot in a remote backward village of India, the story revolves around a letter-writer who passionately helps illiterates write to their loved ones. Naturally, the story splits into several sub-stories each revolving around his clients. Although you might feel that some parts of the story are exaggerated, which the author himself acknowledges, but the movie is still quite amusing and unpredictable.

Movie Review: Yeh Mera India

This is a very good Hindi remake of the movie LA Crash 2004 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crash_(2004_film) . Set in Mumbai the story revolves around more than a dozen seemingly ordinary characters, each with a totally different personality, desires and yet in a creatively way intertwined each and every one to create an interesting story where the actions and thoughts of one effect the life of another. Amongst the movies with a social/patriotic message, I should say this movie would be the most interesting one. It makes you appreciate the true India without going overboard with strong emotions.

My girlfriend took a pregnancy test last night and the results were positive. When she showed it to me, I asked, “Shall we keep it?” She replied, “What’s the point? You can only use them once!”

A Scottish grocer put a collection box on his counter with a small sign reading, “For the Blind.” Charitable customers put in their change. When the box was full, he used the money to buy a new window blind!

Q Frame a sentence with PINK, GREEN, and Yellow.
Lalu’s Answer: When the phone rings GREEN GREEN, Just PINK it up and say YELLOW.

4 stages of marriage
1. “Mad for each other”
2. “Made for each other”
3. “Mad at each other”
4. “Mad because of each other”
- courtesy SMS from Puja

College me ladkiyon ke kitne naam hote hai?
Answer: 4
1. Meri Wali
2. Tere Wali
3. Teri Bhabhi
4. Meri Bhabhi

Today there are 2 term insurance plans that are available online. They require minimal/zero documentation. Since they eliminate the commission agent, you can get a 30 year term insurance cover of 10 million INR (1 cr.) for less than 10,000/- a year.

These are:

1. i-protect by ICICI Prudential
2. i-term by Religare-Aegon

To set the perspective right, a 5 million INR (50Lakh) term insurance cover for 30 years via an agent would cost me:

1. 15,000/- p.a. from LIC Amulya Jeevan
2. 11,000/- p.a. from ICICI- Pure Protect Elite
3. 11,912/- from Aviva Life Shield Plus.

So a saving of almost 50%.

Note: The above rates are for a 28 years old average Indian male. Please consult your financial advisor before investing.

It has 4 different schemes with 5 year lock in and provides 7.85% to 7.95% p.a. interest for 10 years.

Note: Even though IFCI is a PSU, not so long ago it was on the verge of bankruptcy.

Most firms were forced to invest in technology, plant and machinery and few companies like Tamil Naidu Paper (a PSU) and West Coast Paper Mills used the opportunity for capacity addition. Now time is ripe to reap the benefits. My associates made quite a killing in the recent bull run of Tamil Naidu Paper when the new capacity enabled the company to post higher sales and EPS. (I was a student and did not have much surplus cash for investments). West Coast paper mill’s capacity addition was delayed by about 6 months due to some operational difficulties. Hence it is still ripe for investments.

Apart from very low PE, what interests me in this sector is:

1. Stable earnings and revenue (which is independent of economic cycles)
2. High dividend yield. (so you don’t have to grow old before you can see the first fruits of your investment)

“Mick, I’m thinking of buying a Labrador,” said Paddy. “You must be fooking crazy!” said Mick. “Have you seen how many of their owners go blind?”

People say that there is no difference between finish and complete…. but if you marry the right person you are complete, else you are finished.

So I took the hardest route. Download the Red Herring Prospectus (a 500 page document) and did some assessment.

Here are the red flags:

1. Indian banks and financial institutions have invested in this company at as high as 80/- per share. So practically the company has eroded its value over the past 2 years.
2. For the past 3 years, the company is not able to meet the minimum freight agreement that it promised to railways and other infrastructure. This is an indication that the port is facing several operational difficulties.
3. Its board members are quite new to the company.
4. For the past 3-4 years the company has been incurring losses. The IPO of the company is in Aug and yet the company has not prepared its financials for Apr-Jul ’10. For Jan-Mar ’10 the company incurred a loss of 277.7million INR on revenue of 540 million INR. In 2009 the figure was 1176 million INR on revenue of 2191 million INR. For a capital intensive industry with a large fixed cost component, the company is probably not able to achieve economics of operations.
5. Without taking dilution into account, the company’s book value was Rs 8.9/- per share in March ’10. Another 350 million of losses in the subsequent 5 months and dilution due to fresh equity would bring it down further.

So basically you are paying 6 times the Book value of a loss making company which will continue to make losses in the next 3-4 years.

Generally I am biased towards port and other infrastructure investments (electricity, toll roads etc.). The reason being that

1. The major ports in the country are clogged and operate at 90-95% capacity.
2. It takes hell lot of time for a ship to get berth and offload its cargo. Time being money and the logistic company have to pay for ship’s rent while it is waiting gives a huge opportunity for private sector.
3. The condition of infrastructure and industrial peace and harmony in Gujarat is better than what is faced in Eastern India (West Bengal/Orissa) or in Maharashtra. So private ports in Gujarat are best poised to exploit the growing cargo needs of Northern India.

However if your analysis can prove that the company’s revenue/cargo handling is going to increase 4 folds in the new couple of years, I won’t recommend investing in this company.

Today child malnutrition is prevalent in 7 percent of children under the age of 5 in China and 28 percent in sub-Saharan African compared to a prevalence of 43 percent in India.

- source http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/11/magazine/11FOB-Rieff-t.html

When I dug deeper, I discovered that India produces 12% of the World’s Wheat, and 22% of the World’s Rice. (Source: USDA World Crop Supply Assessment) Considering that we have about 17% of the world’s population the domestic food grain production level seems to be adequate for Indian needs.

Are we starving ourselves to export and feed the world?

NO! Till 2009 Wheat and Non-Basmati rice export was banned. Even in 2010 export figures for popular food grains is not a substantial figure.

50% of the Indian population lives in the villages where cultivation of food crops is the major economic activity. So all that needs to be done is harvest the crop and keep aside a few sacks of grains for the household. However what happens is that government appropriates the entire crop and keeps it to rot in their silos. There are several restrictions on quantity and price for a farmer to sell directly to a grain merchant. Also there are restrictions on inter-state transport of grains by non-governmental agencies. All these have resulted in huge wastages and malnutrition.

I am reminded of the famous quote:

“Earth provides enough to satisfy every man’s need, but not every man’s greed.”

It is easy to take liberty for granted, when you have never had it taken from you.

There are two freedoms – the false, where a man is free to do what he likes; the true, where he is free to do what he ought.
Charles Kingsley

Men fight for freedom, then they begin to accumulate laws to take it away from themselves.

Freedom is the will to be responsible to ourselves.
~Nietzsche, Twilight of the Idols, 1888

Freedom is that instant between when someone tells you to do something and when you decide how to respond.
Jeffrey Borenstein

Only free men can negotiate; prisoners cannot enter into contracts. Your freedom and mine cannot be separated.
Nelson Mandela

“We are driven by five genetic needs: survival, love and belonging, power, freedom, and fun.”
William Glasser

It is a strange fact that freedom and equality, the two basic ideas of democracy, are to some extent contradictory. Logically considered, freedom and equality are mutually exclusive, just as society and the individual are mutually exclusive.
~Thomas Mann

All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.
Winston Churchill

So long as the people do not care to exercise their freedom, those who wish to tyrannize will do so; for tyrants are active and ardent, and will devote themselves in the name of any number of gods, religious and otherwise, to put shackles upon sleeping men.
~Voltaire

“Freedom lies in being bold.”
Robert Frost

People hardly ever make use of the freedom they have. For example, the freedom of thought. Instead they demand freedom of speech as a compensation.
~Soren Kierkegaard

Is life so dear or peace so sweet as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me liberty, or give me death!
~Patrick Henry

If you want to be free, there is but one way; it is to guarantee an equally full measure of liberty to all your neighbors. There is no other.
~Carl Schurz

“Man is a being with free will; therefore, each man is potentially good or evil, and it’s up to him and only him (through his reasoning mind) to decide which he wants to be.”
Ayn Rand

The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously.
~Hubert H. Humphrey

Freedom is never voluntarily given by the oppressor; it must be demanded by the oppressed.
Martin Luther King, Jr.

Men fight for liberty and win it with hard knocks. Their children, brought up easy, let it slip away again, poor fools. And their grandchildren are once more slaves.
~D.H. Lawrence, Classical American Literature, 1922

When one tries to analyse the questions above it brings a few interesting things to the fore front –

• It is almost a modern axiom – Football is a a passionate a game that no country can keep itself aloof from it. Hence .It comes as no surprise that same is the case with India. Another modern axiom is – Quality thrives. Hence it also should come as no surprise that since Indian football is not able to provide quality, the fans have naturally spread their interests beyond borders where quality is supreme.

• Another adage is – Too much pain brings apathy. Fans in India have been disappointed so many times that now they have closed their minds on Indian Football.

• Another fact to be noted is – Every country needs heroes. If it cannot find one it will invent one. In the case of India, a scarcity of national stars has made us search beyond for inspiration.

As abysmal as the situation may seem, all is not lost. If we can bring back the quality in football (or for that matter in other Indian sports). We have inspirational players like Baichung Bhutia and Sunil Cherti in our team. All we need to bring back quality is funds and management. But funds only flow in when there is market for the sports and market is ensured only by consistent quality. This viscous circle needs to be broken.

One innovative solution could be to use cricket’s immortal popularity to push up other sports.

• Imagine a sports championship between India-Pakistan or India-Australia where you have 9 matches

• to revive the emotional bonding for other sports – something which has been lost due to apathy.

This model and other innovations like this would definitely bring alive the passion in India football (and other sports like hockey etc).It will gradually help to improve India’s  virtually unknown status in world sports to a one of  respect an pride..
There is light at the end of the tunnel but we need to move towards the end of the tunnel.

Monitor: No prob, boss.

Computer: OK, now it looks like Mouse is moving around so, Monitor, will you move the pointer icon accordingly?

Monitor: Anything you ask, boss.

Computer: Great, great. OK, Mouse, where are you going now?

Mouse: Over to the icon panel, sir.

Computer: Hmm, Let me know if he clicks anything, OK?

Mouse: Of course.

Keyboard: Sir, he’s pressed control and P simultaneously.

Monitor: Oh God, here we go.

Computer: *sighs* Printer, are you there?

Printer: No.

Computer: Please, Printer. I know you’re there.

Printer: NO! I’m not here! Leave me alone!

Computer: Jesus. OK look, you really ne…

Mouse: Sir, he’s clicked on the printer icon.

Computer: Printer, now you have to print it twice.

Printer: NO! NO! NO! I don’t want to! I hate you! I hate printing! I’m turning off!

Computer: Printer, you know you can’t turn yourself off. Just print the document twice and we’ll leave you alone.

Printer: NO! That’s what you always say! I hate you! I’m out of ink!

Computer: You’re not out of in…

Printer: I’M OUT OF INK!

Computer: *Sighs* Monitor, please show a low ink level alert.

Monitor: But sir, he has plen…

Computer: Just do it, damn it!

Monitor: Yes sir.

Keyboard: AHHH! He’s hitting me!

Computer: Stay calm, he’ll stop soon. Stay calm, old friend.

Keyboard: He’s pressing everything. Oh god, I don’t know, he’s just pressing everything!

Computer: PRINTER! Are you happy now?! Do you see what you’ve done?!

Printer: HA! that’s what you get for trying to get me to do work. Next time he…hey…HEY! He’s trying to open me! HELP! HELP! Oh my god! He’s torn out my cartridge! HELP! Please! ERROR!

Monitor: Sir, maybe we should help him?

Computer: No. He did this to himself.

- source (email forward)

1. Try not to venture out too early in the morning. The bombers spend all night psyching themselves up, then say their prayers at dawn, and go off to murder. A second helping of Corn Flakes could save your life.
2. Always try to get a hotel room between 2nd and the 6th floor. This way you are far away from the shootouts, car bombs, robbery etc. and yet not too far away that the fire brigade’s ladders cannot reach you.

Ringtone

A: Hi
D: Hello Ankur, I don’t want to talk to you!

A: What! Why!
D: Oh, wrong Ankur. How are you doing? Long time no see…

I wonder how many times you have participated in such a conversation. How many of you have received this sms:
“My new contact number is XXXX
- XYZ”

Few of the times this message does not have the senders name, and even if it does have I have a tough time decoding it.

I wonder what would be the ideal solution.

Life was much simpler when blackberry and apple were just fruits

— Lyrics of Song from Joan Osbome . Watch the song on You Tube here

As uncanny and as thought provoking the song may be, imagine another thought provoking scenario-  Among all of us on this earth, YOU are given the privilege to be GOD?

Lucky You!! Or so it seems at the first instant. For however exciting the opportunity sounds, it comes with its set of unique dilemmas. For starters, there are so many Gods in this world, .so which God to be?  Without a doubt you deserve the best (after all , you are God). So why be any other God and why not be the best God?

So the dilemma now reshapes itself into – To find which God is the best? Your dilemma is made even more difficult when you realize that you cannot approach anyone for advice. After all, every person would claim that the God he/she follows is the best God.

After realizing that your Social Network will not be able to help you out on this one, you decide to try your hands at History only to discover that human history is tainted with the loss of countless lives in an attempt to put one God better than the other. But amidst all this bloodshed, History still fails to point toward a Supreme God among other Gods.

Keeping History books into history, you decide to research a modern text. Maybe modern analysis can solve your dilemma .You get hold of the book, If world were a Village. The book tells you that if on this earth there were only 100 people — 33 would be Christians, 18 Muslims, 14 Hindus, 16 Non Religious, 6 Buddhists and 13 followers of other religions.

Aha! This gives some pointers. Should you become the God which most people follow? But does this line of thought not imply that the lesser followed Gods are the lesser Gods? Doubtful of this hypothesis, you lunge into the field of Sales expecting to see some light. But alas, as you feared, Sales teaches you that there is no definite relationship pattern between the numbers of consumers of a product and the quality of that product. There are many other parameters which collectively affect the end users choice. So you realize that the parameter ‘Number of followers of a God ‘ is not a sufficient one to choose The God among Gods. (I told you at the start, it won’t be an easy problem solve)

Perplexed by your dilemma, you come up with an exhaustive solution – Study about each God that there is and then decide which God is the Numero Uno!. As comprehensive as  the idea sounds ,let me warn you  it is not a practical one. Just to give you the reason behind my apprehension , when you would reach Buddhism in your study, you will find the Buddha has 32 avatars. So you have to 32 avatars to understand the Buddha.  Oh! What do you say – 32 is not such a big number. You can study the 32 avatars. Okay, But thrn let me tell you about Hinduism, The total Gods in Hinduism is 330000. By the time you would complete the study of their life, your life would be completed.. Case closed!

You seem to be a bit lost now with all these approaches failing to give you an answer. Let me suggest you a compromise – Instead of choosing the best God , let us only decide to choose the best religion. It seems a more manageable prospect. It is also very closely related to the initial dilemma – after all , it was God only who gave religion to men and women ( Or was it  the other way round ? Let’s not dwell into it , we have work to do ).

And on top of other things, your decision would  also help the whole human race. The whole race has been fighting among themselves for ages  to prove their religion as supreme, May you can decide for them and settle the issue once and for all, And they are sure to agree with your decision ( after all  you are God 1 )So let us work together and try to list down the major teachings of the various religions of the world. Then we will try to categorize the teaching into some categories so that we can analyse them in detail.

So let’s get to work ………………………..

And there!!, we have the table ready below. Now all we need to do is analyse and pick out the best religion.

Yes, my friend, I am as shocked as you are — All the religions teach the exact same things via their respective Gods and via their own respective means ??!!
But why then have humans been fighting among themselves since time immemorial l to prove that their religion and their God is better than the religion and God of others? Apologies my friend, I have no idea how to answer this new dilemma. But I have a feeling that the day every human starts taking the trouble to ponder over this question, the world would be a better place. Do you share the same feeling my friend?

What if god was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Trying to make his way home
Just trying to make his way home
Like a holy rolling stone
Back up to heaven all alone
Just trying to make his way home
Nobody calling on the phone
Except for the Pope maybe in Rome

Definition of a Hangover: The wrath of grapes.

The doctor finished examining the teenage girl and asked to speak to the mother privately. “I’m afraid your daughter has a venereal disease.” “Oh, dear,” said the mother. “Could she have caught it in a public restroom?” “Possibly,” said the doctor, “but it would have been highly uncomfortable!”

Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.

When two egotists meet, it’s an I for an I.

The opinion of the boy  –

Star fish on the glass,
On the bed a coin of brass.
A scuba toy bubble at you,
Crawling crab in their too.
Magical fishes tail and fin,
I even spot an identical twin.
Green algae tinge so light,
Turtle floating in delight.
Fragment of lost treasure chest,
A gray-white pebble nest ……

An ocean within a box contained
Ocean’s Pandora for all sustained
“An aquarium“, to capture the sea
More beautiful an idea cannot be !!

The opinion of the fish –

An ocean in a jail,
Beyond box cannot sail.
No friend of my alike,
Oh what a closed life !

No waves and no tides,
Nothing new comes in sight,
Same stone and same sound,
Swim again the same round.
Same food all day night,
No new companion in sight.

Freedom is too much to ask,
Dead is life with no task.
No choices in it to make,
No new direction there to take,
Life out of me I cannot shake,
Alas! the glass will not break.

Looking at me exclaims the boy
Other side of glass, the world is coy
For others I am a toy
It is said -
One’s misery is another’s joy !!

A lot of shady landlords recognize that and exploit the plight of these women. They would rent a 3-4 BHK room; put 4 bunker beds into each of the bedrooms and living room. They would convert the house into a chaul (cramped Mumbai style housing with no privacy or living space) and charge 3,500/- to 4,500/- rent from each of the girls. This translates into 50,000/–70,000/- rent collected from a 3bhk house (about 3 times more than what is the rent for a similar furnished apartment)

Government of India provides very lucrative deals for anybody constructing working women’s hostel. They would be providing 50% of the cost of the land and 75% of the cost of construction for free.

Even the permissible maximum rents that can be charged are quite reasonable.

1. rent for single room (without bath or kitchen) = 2,400/-
2. double sharing basis = 1,600/-
3. Dormitory: 1,200/-

However the hostel is allowed to charge extra for electricity, water, furniture, food and other services provided. Considering that about 60% of the cost are borne by the government and the fact that lower rent translate into higher occupancy, any NGO/organization can make a decent return on their investment. Details of this program can be found here and the list of hostels already operational.

What is more surprising is that the restrictions that government has imposed are also quite liberal and understandable:

1. The hostel needs a resident warden and a security guard.
2. The hostel would be open to all working women and cannot discriminate amongst potential applicants on the basis of color, creed, language, caste etc.
3. No women under any circumstance can be allowed to stay for more than 5 years.
4. At least 30% of the hostel at any given point of time needs to be occupied by women (single or married (with or without kids)) earning less than 16,000/- per month. Out here we are talking about take home salary (or salary declared in Income tax returns) so 16,000/- per month of salary (without bonus/commissions) would translate into about 2.5L CTC. This is actually a reasonably high remuneration for a fresh college graduate.

I wonder why in spite of all the lucrative offers, so many NGOs and organizations have availed this scheme.

When there is a tie, then the person owning the highest value card wins. If there is still a tie (in case of the color) then one owning the lowest value card loses. For the ultimate tie breaker, the sequence of the card suits: spade, heart, diamond, and club in descending order of rank is used.

The fact that 3 of a kind are ranked higher than a Pure Sequence is a serious flaw in the game. As we can see from the table, pure sequence has a lower probability, hence should be considered as a superior hand.

To sum up a quote from the Vedas:

Without any fault of hers I have driven my devoted wife away because of a die exceeding by one [an unsuccessful bet]. My mother-in-law hates me; my wife pushes me away. In his defeat the gambler finds none to pity him. No one has use for a gambler, like an aged horse put up for sale

1. Be proactive: One of the primary reasons why Income Tax deducted by the employer is high is because the person had not communicated his/her intentions to the accounts department well in advance.
2. Collect all bills. Certain expenses like communications and medical reimbursements, LTA, company expense account etc which were incurred are tax deductable only if the employer’s form 16 reflects it. So don’t be lazy in submitting these bills.
3. India is in a progressive taxation environment. As a result as the income rises, so does the taxation rate. As a result if you are employed for only 6 months, don’t be surprised if your IT goes down by not 50% but 60-70%. This is the major source of IT arrears. There are 2 ways around it.
1. Inform your company well in advance that you would be terminating your employment in the mid year.
2. Reduce your IT projection so that the income tax gets revised downwards. This can be done by claiming for all the tax reliefs possible, even if it is fictitious. You can file that you intend to take a home loan (50,000/- tax relief) or donate money in one of the tax exempt funds. This will reduce your tax liabilities and IT arrears.

PS: Please consult your tax consultant.

Living three years in Mumbai has helped me accumulate some  observations which can be of aid when it comes to Mumbai traffic.—

1 . While in Mumbai , one should always carry a hygrometer(a device which measures moisture content in the air around us) with him/her. The intensity of Mumbai Traffic is directly proportional to the moisture content in the air.
As absurd as it may sound, the claim for hygrometer is well supported with data –When there is moisture or worse a slight drizzle in the air, people drive a fraction slower than their usual speed just to be careful to avoid any slippery incidents (Indian roads are supportive of the idea of driving fast). This reduction in speed is cascaded to the traffic behind and eventually brings the traffic to a complete halt. Some fools worsen their speed and hence the traffic by getting all romantic while admiring  the clouds and the rains while driving.
In fact with time and experience, you can deduce from the hygrometer reading the amount of time that you have to be stuck standstill in the traffic. A reading of 60 % (slightly above normal moisture) means that you are to be standstill for 18 minutes. So why not leave the car amidst the traffic and grab a few eatables from the roadside shop? A reading about 80% gives you ample time to catch a good 40 minutes power nap in the car. Anything about 95% should be seen as an opportunity to catch a 2 hour movie in the nearby theatre.

2. Many inexperienced with Mumbai traffic rules make the fundamental mistake of thinking that a queue in Mumbai means standing one behind the other.In Mumbai , a queue means standing one besides the others  and if there is less space then the definition of queue is extended to mean pushing others away and then standing one beside the other.
You don’t want to me more late than you already are to reach home, do you? Then you need to adapt your concepts regarding the queue.

3. Regularly play carom , snooker or billiards .You should gain expertise on one of these games  before you hit the Mumbai roads with your vehicle. These games develop your idea of tricky angles and deviations. This knowledge is critical while driving – you never know when you may need to squeeze in between a few cars to move ahead. Or worse you may have to deflect yourself at an angle when some novice is trying the same squeeze with may end up in his somersault.

4.Always carry good quality ear plugs with you.  For even though the traffic is jammed for the next 5 kms ahead of you, the person just behind you is always convinced that he/she is stuck in this traffic only because of you and if somehow you get out of the way ,  he /she  would whizz to home in 5 seconds . Hence this person keep honking the horns of his/her car ceaselessly.After the few minutes , the ceaseless honking with be accompanies by ceaseless cursing and swearing. Without a nice pair of ear plugs, you will be distracted with all this noise while you are busy swearing at the person ahead of you.

Happy Driving !!!!

Current Indian income tax rules promote tax savvy individuals to take on bank loans. However most individuals are in so much hurry to pre-pay their mortgages that they miss out on this opportunity.

Firstly government allows individuals to get tax rebate on 1.5 half lakh rupees of interest expense on home loan. So that is a cool saving of 50,000/- per annum in tax.

Secondly as per the current income tax laws, an individual has to pay income tax on the rental income. 15% of the income can be offset as maintenance. However if one takes a small loan against that property, then its interest expense can be deducted from the rental income and save tax.

One can get home loan for 8.25% p.a. and save tax using the above mentioned procedure, then effective interest rate would be 5.45% p.a. (tax rate of 33%). One can use this loan to clear the higher interest rate debt or reinvesting the money received in tax (and risk) free securities that earn a higher return one can save tax.

E.g.: post office PPF generates 8% per annum tax free returns.

PS: I am not an authorized tax consultant. So please check with your financial/tax planner before taking out such a loan.

Little Lights in the sky
Little stars twinkle my eye
Little moon above so high
Little eyes can see so high.

Little wings of the butterfly
Little rain drops falling by
Little chirp of the bird that fly
Little cloud in the sky.

Little sound the wind with fly
Little grasshopper jump so high
Little nut of squirrel shy
Little rabbit runs so why .

Little sound and the train go by
Little dog to catch insect try.
Little cat on tree so high
Little plane up in sky.

Little cow chew and mow
Little seeds the farmer sow
Little egg the chicken lay
Little frogs croak to say

Little leaf on the ground fall
Little tree will grow so tall
Little dew on rose so small
Little sound of church toll.

Little little the world so all
Little little I will know it all
Little little I see with my eye
Little little learns the Little I .

Today at the cafeteria table that probably this would be the origin of the term “too good to be true.” A husband who showers his wife with gifts and flowers and is being extra nice is probably because it’s his way of apologizing to his spouse.

I surprised to discover that few of the most religious men were also one of the cruelest men on earth and many of them ill treated and owned several slaves. Some of them rationalized their actions by claiming that they were only doing the God’s work by purging the world of evil and blasphemous. Others rationalized ill treating the slaves by considering them sub-humans. They even went over-board by claiming that enslaving Africa was a “White mans burden (duty)” and by doing so they were civilizing this Dark Continent. These arguments might looks totally stupid today, but they served their purpose and allowed these men to sleep worry-free.

We stop , listen to both and we think……….
Then
Some of us follow the I
and
Some of us follow the You.

The Me – I

A fear hides in the heart
That dreams would die only as dreams
Unfulfilled ambitions yet
And soul would depart
Body would lay satisfied
But wanting soul would still scream.

Even then ,
No more dreams now I strive to pure
No new dimensions I try to explore
Too many constrains the free will found
It killed the dreams, I lived to bound

Past boundaries have punctured the heart
More failures may rip it apart
So I live now this vegetative life
Daily chores and no delight
No excitement in life for sure
But at least pain I bear No More !

The Me – You

You may fear to die,
You may not – I cannot say
But you fear to live
One by one you kill each day

Intense pain is better
Slow pain to death – Never!
Dormant life is sin for sure
So precious life is
Vegetation is no cure .

Attempt and action
Coulld bring joy
Could bring sorrow
But they bring an alive tomorrow
Dream and decision
May give pain
May give gain
But they make you live again.
Inaction is state of defeated mind.
A champion lives each moment
All the time.

Today you vegetate
By taming your soul
Tomorrow the body
With age will tame you old
Before you decay
Yourself you cure
One life, Do More !

A is for Aiscreame (Vanilla, Chocolate, Butterscotch are favourites
with Punjabis).

B is for Backside, and it has nothing to do with your butt. It is an
instruction to go to the rear of a building, or block, or shop or whatever.

C is for Cloney and its not a process for replicating sheep, nor is
its first name George. It is merely an area where people live e.g. ‘Defence
Cloney’.

D is for the proverbial ‘Dangar da Puttar’.

E is for Expanditure, the spending of money.

F is for Fackade, and even though it sounds like a bad word it is
actually just the front of a building (with backside being the back, of
course).

G is for Gaddi, and the way a Punjabi can pilot his gaddi puts any
F1 driver to shame. (If the Grand Prix does come to Delhi there’s no way
Hamilton, Alonso or Kimi can overtake Balvinder, Jasvinder or Sukhvinder’s
taxi.)

H is for ‘Ho Jayega Ji’, and the moment you hear that you have to be
careful because you can be reasonably sure it’s not going to happen.

I is for Intzaar, and to know more about it see P.

J is for Jutt, which every Punjabi seems to be.

K is for Khanna, Khurana, etc, the Punjabi equivalent of the Joneses
(e.g.’Keeping up with the Khurana’s ji’)

L is for Loin, the king of the jungle!

M is for ‘Mrooti’, the car that an entire generation of Punjabis
were in love with.

N is for ‘No Problem Ji.’ To find out how that works see H.

O is for Oye, which can be surprise (Oyye!), a greeting (Oyy!),
anger (OYY!) or pain (Oy oy oy…).

P is for Punj Mint, and no matter how near (1 km) or far (100 km) a
Punjabi is from you he always says he’ll reach you in punj
mint (5 minutes…).

Q is for Queue, a word completely untranslateable into Punjabi.

R is for Riks, and a Punjabi is always prepared to take one (risk),
even if the odds are against him.

S is for Sweetie, Sunny, Simmi and Sonu, who seem to own half the
cars in Delhi. (The other half by their Pappas – like ‘Sweetie de Pappa di
Gaddi’).

T is for the official bird of Punjab: ‘Tandoori Chickun’

U is for when you lose your sex appeal and become ‘Uncul-ji’

V is for VIP phone numbers @ Rs 15 lakh and counting.

W is for Whan, as in ‘Whan are you coming, ji?’

X is for the many X-rated words that flow freely in Punjabi
conversations.

Y is for ‘You nonsanse’, when anger replaces vocabulary in a
shouting match.

Z is for Zindgi which every Punjabi knows how to live to the

Courtsey: Mail forward from Puja
fullest.

I found that before disinfecting the watch, the best way to clean it is by pouring a few drops of petrol/gasoline on it. This solvent is able to dissolve the grease and dirt from deep within the watch’s surface. After thoroughly scrubbing the strap with an old and dry toothbrush, you can wipe it with a cloth and leave it to dry. If your strap has a lot of metal-metal links, then you will be surprised by the quantity of dirt that was hiding in your watch. Repeat the process if you see too much dirt on your cloth.

Best part about petrol is that it completely evaporates within seconds hence there is no risk of rusting or water damage frequent with soapy water cleaning. However still it won’t be advisable to soak the dial/watch mechanism in petrol.

PS: Petrol might dissolve the glue used to stick some gems/crystals on the watch strap. Also test in a small patch if you suspect that the paint/coating on your metal watch might be damaged in the solvent.

The top five reasons why Indians take a personal loan are:

1. Medical emergency,
2. Travel,
3. Wedding,
4. Investment (esp. stock market and speculative property investments),
5. Helping a relatives and family.

And debt consolidation: Some people also use it to refinance their Credit Card dues or loans from informal sources. But in that case, one would realize sooner if not later that it was an expensive decision.

Most personal loans have 3 clauses -

1. A regular EMI for the entire duration of the loan 6-24 months
2. Processing fee from 2-4%
3. Restrictions on prepayment. I.e. one cannot prepay in the first 3-6 months and not more than 50% of the loan balance outstanding in one payment.

These Terms and conditions often don’t match with the optimal debt repayment schedule for the individual. Hence given a choice, I always discourage people from taking a personal loan.

Alternatives

1. Bank overdraft: This is the easiest and the cheapest option for short term credit. If you have a salaried account, then just ask your bank and they would be more than willing to give you a generous 1-2L line of credit which you can repay at ease. Charges like account opening charges, commitment fee (0.25-0.5% of the line of credit) may look like a lot, but due to flexibility in repayment, the overall interest expense is much lower.

2. Credit Card: If you search the archives of enagar, you will find reference to an older article which tells you how one can draw money equal to the credit limit (which is higher than the cash limit) for 50 days at a cost of 3% (paid upfront) and 1.8% for subsequent months.

If we reflect upon our life and try to recollect the most cherished moments that we have experienced so far in our journey, we would discover that the majority of these moments were part of our childhood phase. Those indeed were the good old days! And if we dig a bit more into the cherished moments of our childhood, we would, without doubt find that a few of these incidents have a bicycle embedded in it.

The cycle and its cousins have a very special relationship with us. They touch and shape every stage of our life.

We might not realize, but the cycle; in its various forms influences us in so many ways——-

When we are born, a distance relative of the cycle – The Cradle surrounds us with its protection. The Cradle helps us to journey around the world even before our legs take up that responsibility.

With the passage of time, we grow out of the cradle and climb on the Tricycle. It is our first independent vehicle. It is we who control where to take it and with what speed to drive it. It is a friend which helps us explore the world, a friend which rides with us through impossible curvy and crooked places, a friend which takes many a falls with us but a friend which always is ready to go wherever our infant imagination wants to take us.

As we grow up a bit more, the tricycle becomes a thing of the past and out comes the Bicycle. The Bicycle is a big step in our life. When we dash on our bicycle, it gives us a taste of the speed, which is required by us to move ahead in life. When we fall down from our bicycle, it gives us a taste of the pains that life has to offer. When we complete our first bicycle ride without anyone’s support, it gives us a taste of thrill, freedom and confidence required to live.
Then as we grow up even more, we abandon the cycle and its relatives for the more comfortable means of commutation. The Cycle, from being a tool of discovery ends up being just a piece of decoration. And with time, the piece of decoration decays into a piece of debris for us.

We abandon the Cycle and throw it out of our house and out of our life. But the cycle, which was our best friend, is not able to come to terms with the fact that we have given up on the friendship. It desperately tries to come back to us, albeit in the form of a exercise equipment in the gym but there also it hardly gets any extended attention from us.

With time the Cycle realizes that it is not wanted anymore. It then waits patiently and watches us live our life. It watches and sees that the day has come when life has caught up with us, it sees the day has come when our limbs have began begin to fail us.

At this lonely stage of our life, when not many people want to talk to us, we can but only  sit down and reflect on our past days and realize that one friend is still waiting for us in the junkyard outside the house – Our old Bicycle.

But alas, when we could, we deserted it .Now, even though we want to, we cannot cycle anymore. Our body no longer has the strength to do so .We can only think about the time when we cycled and take pleasure in the vicarious thrills.

Our eternal buddy, the Cycle realizes our state. It stays aloof, as it is angry with us for we deserted it for years together. But eventually , for the sake of friendship it decides to come back to us and free us of our loneliness and helplessness — The Wheel Chair helps us to journey around the world even after our legs have given up that responsibility.

Mari – Have you ever ridden a cycle in your life?
Sam – Yes
Mari – Do you still ride a cycle?
Sam – No
Mari – Would you ride it in the future?
Sam -  I ………………

Using this loophole, one can minimize the pre-payment penalty/charges by calling the bank one month to increase the EMI and revert it back to the old levels next month. Chances are that you would be able to stretch a little and continue paying that higher EMI for a few extra months. Hence reducing your interest expenses.

When it comes to debt, don’t ignore any processing charges, penalties or fines. It might put you in a debt trap.
For example
A 1M (10Lakh) INR loan for 15 years period at 8.75% has an EMI of 9,800/-

If you prepay 1EMI (9,800 on the first day), it will save you from paying about 3.5 EMIs 15 years later which is a net saving on 24,500/- in interest expense alone.
Please note that this calculation assumes that you would continue to pay the same EMI even though now your loan outstanding is (10Lakhs – 9,800/-)

A saint once told me that – “Son, none of us are alone! All of us have Cosmic Energy Waves around us which surround us at each and every moment of our existence”. I don’t know about cosmic waves , but one thing that I know of is that – I am surrounded by stupid commercials around me at each and every moment of my existence. Hoardings, TV, Radios, SMS,Internet, Sales call – they are everywhere.
And so deeply have these ads affected me , that nowadays , I cannot even dream without commercial breaks in between.
Spending a lot of time analyzing these commercials , I have discovered that their behavior is not as stupid and random as it seems , albeit it is governed by well defined laws.

So ladies and gentlemen, let me present before you the Three Laws of Commercials.

Law number I
For our protection first there is God, second there is …….Pepsodent and Dettol

You don’t believe me ? Let me explain.
Just have a look at the Pepsodent Commercial–24 hour security, 24 hour defense, dishum dishum and what not! You are forced to wonder how humans survived all those prehistoric ages without the protection of Pepsodent.”

Now onto to Dettol -Unfortunately, I came to know about the powers of dettol quite late in my childhood.
You see, when I was a little boy , I used to fall sick before every school exam and my teacher used to scold me , ”You dumb head .You stupid boy. Exams make you fret so much that you fall sick.”
Well…., Medical Science was not so advanced in my childhood days. Little did my teacher know that the cause of sickness was not my dumbness but the fact that I do not take bathe in Dettol Soap.

Leaving my sad childhood behind, let me move on to the next law.

Law number II Where ever you go, our network follows

As I already mentioned, these ads will never leave you.
On weekdays, my primary activities in office consist of answering emails, typing some code and convincing sales guys on my cell phone that I am in no need of pre approved car and home loans.
Imagine, after 5 days of such hard work you are enjoying a deserving, peaceful Saturday afternoon sleep and as you are about to fall into deep slumber ,it at this precise moment that your mobile gives an SMS blast. Sleepy and tired, you somehow reach out to your mobile –– Whoosh – “SMS on 54545 to know your Class X th result.”Tell me , why the hell would I want to know my 10th board result at this age ??!!!!
Actually if I reflect upon my marks, I probably did not want to know about them even at that time.

I mentioned about this SMS problem to my friend Sanjeev, and he is like –“What’s the big problem, dude ? Keep your mobile on silent mode while sleeping! ”.
Life …my friends, alas, is not so simple. You see, Sanjeev does not have a girlfriend .But I have. And she calls me every 5 minutes questioning me , “Where are you , what are you doing ? What are you not doing ? What took you 20sec to receive the call ?”

Phewwww…

Believe me my friends , the only thing more dangerous in this world than a GPS tracking enabled girlfriend is the Internet Pop UP ads . The Devil could not be everywhere – so he made them. These Internet pop ups have a tendency to pop up at the wrong place, at the wrong time and with the wrong content. (Boys would know all about it : ) )
For instance ,when I surf the net and no one is around , the pop-up will always try to find the perfect bride for me. It has been trying the same for the past 5 years. But when I surf the net and my father is around, the ‘Matrimonial Pop Up’ is always replaced by the ‘Get Blind Date with Hot Mumbai Girls PopUp’.
One of two more of these Pop Up incidents ,and I am sure to thrown out of the house by my father.

Anyways , popping on to
Law Number III – Impossible is Nothing.

Impossible is nothing for the ad makers. For them, the sun rises in the west. You have no idea what they will end up teaching you in their ads.
Let me give you an example,

Remember the surf excel ad ?
A young chap comes up in a cap and says “Stains are good ?”.
Young chap, you say stains are good!! . Obviously you have not met my mother!

HDFC Child investment plan
Remember , 4 year old, giving investment advice to parents ? “Papa grow up I want to be an astronaut. So do some investment” I wish I was so intelligent as a 5 year old. My family would have been so rich, and, I would have been an astronaut. Better to be on Mars than in this Mumbai traffic. Any day .

One more instance -
Radios are at another level. Before following cricket commentary on radio I used to believe that Sachin Tendulkar is the best batsman that India has. But now after following cricket on radio , I have realized that it is actually BSNL. Sachin only takes 1s and 2s , it is BSNL who hits all the 4′s and 6 ‘s.
”Aur ek laga ek aur BSNL Chauka ”

Those were the three laws, ladies and gentlemen.

I have figured out the laws that govern these commercials but I am yet to figure out how to escape these commercials. It does not seem like happening during my lifetime, In fact, I fear that even after death when I ask the Almighty upstairs -”God , am I going to get heaven or hell. What are my chances.? “ The Almighty would just stand there eating a Britannia biscuit and smile “Son , its 50/50”

This expression is very close to the heart of those phrase – throwers who apart from shooting phrases have another nagging habit – Morning Walk. These early risers are under the impression that just because they get up at 4 AM , mother nature has nothing better to do than unravel all its secret to them. Anything which they see or observer is Mother Nature’s message to them and it is their utter responsibility to capture that event in a quizzical English phrase. For instance, they would see a bird chewing a worm in the morning and conclude – The early bird gets the worm .
I want to question my early riser Friend – “My dear , early riser , Have you ever taken an afternoon walk – I have taken –you see, I get up late and I am not ashamed of it and I can swear to Dear Lord that at even 12 in the noon; when the sun is at the highest point above our head , I have seen birds catching and eating worms with considerable ease.”

Another favourite of these early risers – ‘it’s a small world out there’.
Of course my friend, the world would seem small to you when you keep meeting the same 3 people every day at 4AM .After all, not many are as crazy as you to get up at 4AM for a casual stroll. And of course, when all you do is walk the same 400 meters everyday with no one around – your world is bound to be a small one . By the way, just for the records, the world seems fairly large to me when I am stuck in traffic daily for 4 hours while commuting between office and home.

2.My second complaint is called – A little knowledge is a dangerous thing.

This complaint is against those phrase- throwers who are under the false impression that they know all. They pass phrases that provide incorrect advice. And the ’Not so know it all ‘ people like me tend to believe them and get into trouble. Let me share a few phrases which these Shakespeare kins have blessed me with.
The worst phrase I have ever got is – “If you love someone set them free. If they come back to you, they are yours. Else they never were”. I heard this and said – “Very well – seems good “. So I did all the preparations and proposed to seven girls, one on each day of the week and came back. I said to me – “What’s the harm? As per the phrase, if none of them love me, then the worse that can happen is that none of them will come back.” Well , not only did all of them come back , all of them came back at the same time with their boyfriends and while I was lying in the hospital bed with all the Get Well Soon flowers around me, life certainly did not feel like a bed of roses.

Another piece of gem from these saviours of Queens English – ‘It is a blessing in disguise ‘ . I don’t want to get into the details but I can assure you from my experience – that it not important to be in disguise when you are blessing someone; but on the contrary, disguise is important when you are cursing someone. And the bigger the person you’re planning to curse – the better your disguise needs to be.

3.Last but not the least, My third complaint is called – We cannot spell success without “U”.

This complaint is dedicated to those phrase – throwers, who just for the sake of acting smart, play around with alphabets and numbers in their conversations.Again, let me give you a few enriching examples. But before we proceed, I want to inform the phrase throwers of one more interesting fact which they seem to have missed – “Without U , we cannot spell “Stupid “ also.”
An apple a day keeps a doctor away. This phrase itself brings tears to my eyes and fills me with anger. You see, as a child I hated my family doctor because his only ambition in life seemed to be to give me more and more vaccination injections. He wanted to protect me against the diseases which existed and against the diseases which may come into existence in the near or far future. Boy, did he believe in “Prevention is better than cure “.
Naturally .a s a child ,I hated doctors. So when I heard – An apple a day keeps a doctor away; I was overjoyed. And as a child I used to be quite intelligent also (I still am). So I quickly calculated – “Eating an apple every 8 hours will keep 3 doctors away”.
Today, I suffer from Haemochromatosis – excessive iron content in the blood. And I have to visit the doctor every second day. All thank to the English phrases and the damned phrase-throwers.

In the end , I know I cannot expect the barrage of these phrase-throwers to scale down , but to all of you out there waiting to bombard your pearls of Queen’s English ,before you open your guns , I would like to remind you of one more old is gold phrase – ‘Silence is Golden’

But, why do we think and act in a particular manner, favouring a particular response or a approach more than the other?
We can answer the above question if we can identify the parameters which define our responses. The knowledge of these responses can help us modify, restructure and fine-tune these parameters to make our personalities more flexible and more adaptable to situations.

Transactional Analysis (TA) – An analysis technique in physiology developed by Eric Berne can help us to answer the above asked question.

The basis of Transactional Analysis is the assumption that our brains stores and records each and every experience which we encounter in our lifetime. This total collection of experiences in our brain defines our personality. And when we experience our next event, the brain interprets and responds to it based on the historic data stored inside it.
The assumption stated above has been proven by medical science. Various neurological experiments, physiological examinations and other scientific analysis have proven that our brains stores and records our each and every experience. Along with that, the brain also stores each and every visual image, sound and emotional feeling experienced by us during a particular experience. Any stimulus which maps to any of these old stored data can make us relive the earlier experience.

An obvious question which comes up is; if the brain records everything, why do we forget so many things in our day to day life? It is because we can forcefully retrieve only a small set of data from our brain. This is because even though our brain is an excellent recorder, the querying aspect of our brain is underdeveloped. But it does not mean that if we cannot access any particular data, the data is lost forever. This inaccessible data can be accessed by the brain at a sub-conscious level (without us releasing it) to respond to situations.

We can understand the above retrieval concept with the help of a common incident. Recall the incident when you met an old friend of yours after a gap of few years.Statements such as “Oh! You have grown so tall? You have put on some weight!” are common in such meetings.
Now, if just before meeting your friend, someone would have asked you – “How did your friend look like when you met him/her the last time? What was the height of your friend when you met him/her the last time?” You might not recall with much accuracy the required details. But on meeting your friend, you are able to detect the slightest change in the facial characteristics, height and weight of your friend. It means the old data about your friend is precisely stored somewhere in the brain and used by the brain for comparison at a sub conscious level. This example shows us that our brain has all the data but forceful retrieval of all this data is beyond our capacity.
Once (and if) we are now comfortable with the assumption which Transactional Analysis utilizes, let us look into Transactional Analysis.

As per Transactional analysis – this capacity of the brain to record all our experiences and use them at a sub conscious level causes our personality to be segmented into 3 parts –

• The Parent

• The Child

• The Adult.

Remember these are not the stages of life but the segments of our personality. These three segmented parts work together to form our personality.
Let’s understand the characteristics of these three segments-

The Parent
The Parent is the huge collections of recordings which are stored in our brain unquestioned or as ultimate facts. Most of the Parent is formed in the first 5 years of our life. Even after that, although at a slow rate, the adult keeps growing throughout our lifetime.
e.g. – When we are young, we are taught “Always use right hand for handshakes. Using a left hand is bad “. This fact is recorded in our brains. We start to believe in it without questioning. Even today, as a grown up, we feel reluctant to prefer our left hand for important things. Don’t we?

The Child
While external events are recorded in the Parent, the feelings associated with these events are stored in the Child. Most of the Child is formed in the first 5 years of our life but just like the Parent, the Child also keeps growing throughout our lifetime.
e.g. – When we are young, we all have experienced incidents where people laughed at us when we made mistakes. This could happen while making an error while reading out from a book in class or while we may have fell down while playing etc. These feelings of public embarrassment remains etched in our brains forever. That is why we fear public speaking and centre-stage so much. We face an audience and we start shaking all over.

The Adult
The adult starts developing around the age of 4, when we ;earn how to crawl and walk around, The adult keeps getting more active as we grow up. As the adult starts growing , growth rate of the Parent and the Child slows down.
The growth of Adult can be associated with the growing inquisitiveness in young ones. The Adult does not agree to store any data without its analysis and validation. The Adult is the analyzer and used the data from Parent, Child and Adult experience to build up its response. It tries to explore and find answers.

The data of the Parent and the Child is experienced by us as our inner voice, inner feeling, voice of the heart, gut feeling response to any situation. The data of the Adult help us to approach a situation via logical deduction, analysis and thought process.

All of us have different data stored in these three segments of our brain as our experiences are unique. Hence, our response, reactions, thought processes and weightage to different issues are unique.

Lets see discussion practical examples to understand how our reactions are different based on different triggers.
1. Seeing a cockroach
Many of us freak out when we see a cockroach because some of us almost programmed in our Child be scared of the cockroach. When we are young we have seen people terrorized on seeing a cockroach. The sight of the cockroach triggers the old Child memory and we experience the same terror as a natural reaction. Things would not be so scary if we gave ourselves a chance to think about the same and practise to let our Adult be triggered on seeing the Cockroach.

2. Questions on Core beliefs
We do not let anyone question our core beliefs like God, Religion, Morals etc. They are deep rooted in our Parent. We never question them or let others question them. No matter how good at negotiating (An Adult characteristics) and discussion (An Adult characteristics) we may be , we may be not at all entertain the idea of anyone questioning our core beliefs .They are de facto correct for us and there is not need for discussions on them.

3. Instinct
The Instinct is provided by the Child and the Parent. Many times our Adult logical analysis may tell us something else but we our inner belief, our gut feeling for a situations says something else. A large number of times our gut feeling is right as well .We cannot explain why the Adult response felt wrong but we knew it was wrong. It is because the Child and the Parent do not use logical deduction to come to a conclusion but that does not mean that they are wrong.

The above practical examples give us a peek into the vast scope of areas where transactional analysis could help us. For instance, It can help us to understand ourselves better, understand and interact with others efficiently with others and so on…..
If you find the topic interesting and worth exploring; I would recommend you a book –“ I’m Ok , You’re Ok” by Thomas A Harris.

Have you chosen the right manager?

There is no dearth of innovation.

Carrying portable water from the wells/streams to the house has traditionally been a back breaking job for most women in the villages of India. To solve this problem, Q-Drum was invented. This cylindrical structure has a provision to tie a rope in the center using which even a kid can roll 50L of water on a flat surface.

I have ordered for one such drum for myself and would post the field test results once i conduct them.

On this day , anyone of us could be left behind to
remorse the destruction which
we all caused to our planet.and the destruction
which the planet replied to us……………….

<poem>

For there might still be a green grass bed
Hence I keep dragging my feet ahead
Burning wind beats my skin to death
Air in my lungs sting with every breath
But I keep dragging my feet  instead ,
For there might still be a green grass ahead.

Longs my soul for a flower
Just to rest my eyes;
Longs my soul for a bird chirp
Just to bless my ears.
The forests I still can see
But Concrete grows now for Trees
The lakes I still can feel
But its now dry and Dump-Sealed.

The color of rivers once blue is now so red
Still swim in them the humans but now as dead.
But I do not swim yet;but drag my feet instead ,
For there might still be a green grass ahead.

And now it seems so simple
How we missed it then ;  I dread —
” If trees do not give us food
Industries would  never give us bread “.

And now my time draws a die
No one around but yet I scream ;
Not for help —-
But with  Hope
that now I shall be clean.
But with  Prayer in my heart
That if by chance some human alive walks across my bones
Before he dies , he covers me up just with a few stones.’
But with with Joy in my soul
For in the new place I shall now tread
There might still be a green grass bed.

Well things were somehow not so simple when I tried it.
I certainly put the non-stick pan correctly on the gas and I certainly turned on the gas .(important step else how will the food cook – I thought it myself , it was not even mentioned in the recipe book ! ).
Then I took an egg , hit it with a spoon so that it cracks and dropped the inner contents of the egg on the frying pan. Within 30 seconds I learned , the non- stick pan is a misnomer as my egg got stuck on the pan’s surface badly, I somehow scraped it off from the pan and placed it in the only place it was worth placing – the dustbin.
After much extensive research on the internet , I discovered that even in non-stick pan one has to put some oil on the pan’s surface to avoid sticky incidents.I started wondering if the ‘non stick pan‘ should actually be called ‘nonstick only after using oil pan‘ , but decided to think over it on a later date and came back to give another attempt to the egg half fry.
On coming back to the cooking area , I realized that  I  had forgotten to turn off the gas.But that’s not such a big deal , is it ? I took back the misnomer non stick pan , put it on the gas , put some oil on it , let it heat up a but and cracked an egg on it again.Much to my disappointment , as the egg touched the pan , the inner yellow portion(yolk) of the egg burst open and spill all over the pan.My initial impression was that it must have been an egg of a chicken with weak inner strength and feeble character.But then I though – Chickens cannot be humans , hence there must be some other reason.
And then it stuck me – it the same thing which has been the cause of all those injuries to me during my childhood – Newton’s acceleration-due to gravity  g . I realized that I must not drop the egg from a very high height else it will fall down with a faster speed due to gravity and hence spill open on impact with pan. Now the next confusion was what is the ‘break point height limit’ of each egg. They should mark it on each of the eggs else how will one know after which height the egg will break. But I thought , that it expecting too much from technology.Maybe, after a decade or so it would be mandatory to sell eggs with break point height linit marked on them. I realized , I  was going ahead of my time so I broke the chain of thoughts and came back with a fresh egg.
Now this time , I did everything right -  pan , oil , heat , correct height , but for some reason I got another unexpected output.The yellow(yolk) which is supposed to be in the center (refer the pic) with the white albumen  surrounding it was actually present on the edge of the white albumen. It seems as if the it wanted to leave the white bed and venture the world on it ‘s own. I know what you are thinking – the egg has the characteristics of traveling , it must belong to a migratory bird.
But alas , my friend – in this world there are no simple explanations.It turns out the culprit was center of mass , trigonometry and of course gravity. See,at the time of cracking the egg, if the egg is not parallel to the surface of the pan , then all the inner contents of the egg will slide to one side of the egg and the force of gravity (mg) will split into mgcos@ ans mgsin@ (will always was a bad thing while solving physics problems in school), which will cause your yellow yolk liquid (which is heavier compared to the white albumin liquid) to fall away from the exact vertical point below on the pan.The white albumen liquid , on the other hand , which has lesser weight and lesser self – ego  will not be bothered by this inline ans still fall in the center.The end result will be a displaced yolk in the half fry.
It took me 3 eggs to experiment with and confirm my research. It would have also calculated the angle @ which causes the yolk to fall out of the white portion completely of the half fry – it would have been a breakthrough discovery (just like the calculation of escape velocity – the minimum  velocity which is required by satellites to launch them successfully in the earth’s orbit ) but I was running out of eggs , hence I had to put my enlightening research on hold.
Now all excited – with pan , oil , heat up of pan , correct height , no incline – I cracked the egg and VOILA  (or maybe WAKA   – the phrase of the moment – thanks to FIFA and Shakira ) -I got a perfect half fry egg.
I gobbled it up after adding salt to it and rushed to write this blog to tell everyone about it.
After the successful half fry and this blog , I feel so satisfied with my efforts – now there is no chance of anything going wrong – or is it ? Damn , the gas is still on …………….

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 32)
1. Nice looking
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 42)
1. Not too ugly
2. Doesn’t drive off until I’m in the car
3. Works steady – splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I’m talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 52)
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn’t belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn’t borrow money too often
4. Doesn’t nod off to sleep when I’m venting
5. Doesn’t re-tell the same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off the couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 62)
1. Doesn’t scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn’t require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he’s laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it’s the weekend

What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 72)
1. Breathing.
2. Doesn’t miss the toilet.

Send this to the women who will enjoy reading it and to the men who can handle it!

AFTER BEING MARRIED FOR 44 YEARS, THE HUSBAND TOOK A CAREFUL LOOK AT HIS WIFE ONE DAY AND SAID, “Darling, 44 YEARS AGO WE HAD A CHEAP APARTMENT, A CHEAP CAR, SLEPT ON A SOFA BED AND WATCHED A 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE TV, BUT I GOT TO SLEEP EVERY NIGHT WITH A HOT 25-YEAR-OLD GIRL.
NOW I HAVE A $500,000..00 HOME, A $45,000.00 CAR, NICE BIG BED AND PLASMA SCREEN TV, BUT I’M SLEEPING WITH A 65-YEAR-OLD WOMAN. IT SEEMS TO ME THAT YOU’RE NOT HOLDING UP YOUR SIDE OF THINGS.”

HIS WIFE IS A VERY REASONABLE WOMAN. SHE TOLD HIM TO GO OUT AND FIND A HOT 25-YEAR-OLD GAL, AND SHE WOULD MAKE SURE THAT HE WOULD ONCE AGAIN BE LIVING IN A CHEAP APARTMENT, DRIVING A CHEAP CAR, SLEEPING ON A SOFA BED AND WATCHING A 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE TV.

AREN’T OLDER WOMEN GREAT? THEY REALLY KNOW HOW TO SOLVE YOUR MID-LIFE CRISIS

Let me use the corollary of a house to explain how relationships are formed. A complete stranger would not be allowed even inside the main gate of the house and would have to yell from outside to be heard. There is a well defined and known protocol for treating guests and based on how much one trust a person, he/she would be allowed access to the front gate, porch, living/drawing room, kitchen, bedroom etc. A stranger cannot walk into the bedroom without being labeled as an intruder and similarly the host cannot welcome a stranger to the bedroom without raising suspicion about the sly intentions of the rendezvous.

In a relationship one has to pass a serious of hurdles before being trusted and unless there is trust, one is scared of telling the truth and revealing oneself. Even if you visit a hospital and ask strangers “How are you doing?” chances are that the response would be “I am fine.”

Everybody is economical with truth and honesty often makes one feel naked and vulnerable. Hence we create secrets and sharing secrets is a way through which a lot of people (esp. girls and kids) communicate to others that they are trusted and also check their trustworthiness. Hence my assertion that contrary to popular perception one has to build up trust before they can expect honesty in most relationships. However once the trust gets build up, there is no faster and irreversible way of breaking it than dishonesty with malicious intention.

On a lighter note, I have known couples who have problems telling their spouses that they are fat or what they truly feel about the new home décor. In most cases, their spouses know the real answer/feelings of their partner and this white lie does not bother them or damage their relationship because the intention was not malicious.

PS: I have had no formal education in sociology.

I tell you why.

The film story is very different from the game and also sucks (My girlfriend differs on this point).

The action sequence leaves me with a hollow feeling when compared to the game series.

The female protagonist, with due respect, stands nowhere in comparison to Monica Bellucci, who modelled and voiced the game’s female character.

Coming to Mr. Coyle, I don’t know if I have stereotyped him as a comedy genre actor or because of his heavy British accent, I don’t think he could portray the character Tus very convincingly (This, after the fact that he is a theatre actor). Half the time while he spoke, I expected a joke in his very Jeff-like voice.

I don’t know about others, but people who were a fan of the game series or of Couping…don’t go for it. It simply ruined my evening.

my experience says that satire is one of the most dangerous forms of communications.
1. it assumes that everyone except the recipient has a higher intellect. (esp the person who is trying to have a lighter moments)
2. offends the recipient because it does not give him chance to enjoy the statements.
3. the words and the meaning are so different that often the audience does not get the joke

A cartoonist would often use satire and there are a lot of people who feel that slapstick comedy is a cheep form of entertainment.

However one has to understand that when a professional or cartoonist uses satire everyone knows it’s a joke, and they don’t take his/her words literally. In everyday life, when we try to use satire, there are a lot of people who would take a few moments before they realize it’s a joke. Also a professional entertainer can insult and make fun of a celebrity, politician etc. because firstly the joke is intended to humor you and not those celebrities. Secondly he does not know that celebrity and hence is ambivalent to their reaction.
In life, it is very easy to crack a joke, but very difficult to ensure that no boundaries are transgressed.

A professor of philosophy came into his class with a glass jar, some rocks, pebbles, sand and a cup of coffee. Then he asked his students if all the ingredients would fit in the jar. Looking at the entire ingredients, most of them replied in the negative.

The professor proceeded to fill all the rocks in the jar. Then he took the pebbles and poured them in, while shaking the jar. They fit in the gaps between the rocks. The professor then looked up and asked what the students thought of it now. They had started smiling. The professor then proceeded to fill in the sand. It too, fit in between the pebbles. Then finally, the professor poured in the coffee, a perfect fit. One of the students got up and asked him the meaning of the experiment.

The professor replied – “The jar represents your life. The rocks represent your basic needs, the pebbles your secondary needs and the sand is tertiary needs. If you want to have everything in life, learn to prioritize correctly. If you go for your basic needs first, like family, friends and happiness and then for secondary needs as job and salary, you may be able to get even your superficial needs as societal position, recognition etc. Prioritize them wrongly, and your life isn’t enough to hold all of them.”

After a round of applause, another student said – “But professor, what about the coffee?”

“Oh that,” said the professor with a smile, “that just shows that no matter how full your life may be with your needs, always find an evening for a cup of coffee with a good friend. It fits in with everything.”

During my work experience as an engineer, I had to frequently negotiate with Korean suppliers. They couldn’t pronounce my name so whenever they came to my section, they would ask anyone with a sweeping gesture over their lips and chin to indicate me. It later became a standard joke in the department to use that gesture for me.

I was once having a flaming-tequila shot with a friend in a pub. The bartender gave me my shot and said – “Bhai sahib, araam se warna dadhi jal jayegi.”(Go easy or your beard might catch fire). It was some time before my friends could stop laughing.

The latest one was from a restaurateur who saw me after at least two and a half years. I used to haunt his joint often in the earlier days, but I wasn’t sure he would recognize me after such a gap. When I walked up to him and asked if he remembered me, he grinned, shook my hand and said -“Amitabh ki dadhi wale khud ko Amitabh samajte hai, par hum to asliyat jaante hai na.”(People sporting Amitabh’s beard might think they are Amitabh, but I know the real person behind it). Old friends remembering you…it feels nice, it always does.